No, I didn’t intend it. Don’t call it a prank.

April Fool’s Day takes me back to the past like a mad cow chewing all day’s grubby grass-rolls with a fascinating smile. With a demure slightness, the day pings back all those ‘horseplays and fooling arounds’!

A simple prank proved out to be a bit worrisome last year. I had called up my friend 3G’s (name changed to provoke him) momma in Kerala and gave her some shocking news! I informed her that he got married in Mumbai and was coming back home. With ample seriousness and convincing voiceover, she was told that this wife of him was a Punjabi, the only daughter in her family and hence the Sardarjis in Mumbai were about to make a riot in search of the girl. 3G was on his way of eloping with his wife.

The poor lady just asked me what I was saying as she couldn’t believe what I was saying. Her voice tapered and she was about to break down. She made a shrill cry and handed over the phone to his sister, who was watching all these.

Poor 3G, no one in this planet can think of him doing like that. Why about eloping and marrying, he even stays away from looking at a girl right for a while! But this mom believed with pain that her son got changed once he came to Mumbai 2 months before.

His sister told me that her mom was not feeling well. I couldn’t hold it any more as I got frightened that something wrong would happen. I told her that it was a prank directed by me. Though she did not really understand the meaning of April Fool’s day, she didn’t abuse me over the phone!

During my schooling days with my brother, innovative pranks used to give us brakeless laughter. Once we had created a ‘paper tiger’. We coiled rubber bands tightly on a matchstick and wrapped it in gift wrapper. At various crucial points on the walkway, we placed them and hid near to watch the fun. I still remember one of our innocent victims who took it with utmost care. After confirming that no one was watching him, he opened it like a greedy dog ragging a food trash. In a moment, he got shocked as the rubber band loosened matchstick and it created a krrrrrrrrrrrrr sound on the paper! Sure, our victim was not having a nice time! Wasn’t it creaky?

Another outstanding prank I did was with a friend, Jose. We superglued coins on some public places and roads. And the result was beyond our laughing limits!

Along with its fun, April Fool’s day has its difficult moments too. As an active prankster, you tend to disbelieve others even if they tell you actual facts. Theeppathi Muthalali died on April 1, but we refused to believe the person who first brought the news. Muthalali was a businessman and he used to run the main grocery store in Edamon, a place where we used to live. By the time we confirmed his death, he went under the soil.

One more April Fool’s day is in. My friends, I don’t really know what I should do to all of you. But 3G, Joseph and Jose, be sure, there is something on your way!! And of course, you too dear Jackass!!

‘Bed Bugs’ rhymes well. But make our life, a hell!

Bed bugs won’t care whether you are a male or female, cool or sentimental or whether your blog is growing. Come in group, they’ll booze your blood as if a Cranberry Bacardi Breezer.

The beauty of your nights and the story of your dreams will together turn to a nightmare as these sleep-slayers dine on your body.

I had days when I left my body wholeheartedly to their grand feasts. With me, one of my close friends, Santosh Kumar too had these ‘bugrighted’ days. We used to stay in a house in Coimbatore, where I did my PG Advertising Degree.

He had a bed, I, a mat, but we never slept! The bed bugs cheered all through!

An incidental story has its time here. 'Bed Bugs Killer Machine'. The Classified Advertisement read. ‘Kill all the bed bugs and put an end to your sleepless nights! .Original price Rs 1000. Our price, just 500’.

Uncle Johny couldn’t hold his excitement! In addition to writing for one, he went on to enlighten the neighbors with the news, since he thought that their life too would be as depressed as his own due to the prying bed bugs.

The news spread anticipation. Uncle Johny’s Bed Bug Machine came by post.

The Post Man came running. With him, a procession of eager villagers too.

Well packed in a hard-paper box, the machine evinced something special about it. Uncle Johny came forward. He seized the machine from the post man. With a kind of smugness, he opened the box. A

wesome, there was another box inside that! As brows got raised, he opened the second one. What was taken out was startling, a hammer and a stone!

There was a message attached to the hammer! It read like this; ‘When you find a bed bug, catch it with your hand and place it on the stone. Take the hammer and knock lightly till the bug dies’.

Later someone told that Uncle Johny had regained his consciousness at night! Bed bugs help too!

Panikkathi was a servant of my grandmother. Dark and short, she was a bold woman of around 60 years old.

She belonged to a crazy gene as she used to do every weird thing in life such as smoking, drinking, dance after boozing etc.

During our childhood, she used to tell us stories of ghosts and fiends so that we wouldn’t get out of home at night to catch fireflies.

Catching fireflies was only meant for us, the luckiest kids like us!

What I wanted to tell you now is a melancholic note from Panikkathi’s life.

Panikkan was the husband of our heroin. He was an old sagely fellow, who took care of a temple nearby his home. One day he died leaving Panikkathi alone in this world. Between trembling nights, Panikkathi lived her lonely days.

One day, an old man from a distant place came to stay with Panikkathi. Panikkathi found it wholehearted to offer a stay to the homeless man.

Days passed like a brakeless car. And Love happened! Panikkathi was in love with that man! Having decided to be the better halves, they fixed a date for their wedding.

The auspicious day came. Dressed in her simple bridal clothes, Panikkathi came out. Like shy conquered, she was looking down and smiling to the floor. Panikkan’s temple was seemed to be a happy preface for her new life.

The registrar came! The registration book came! But the bridegroom did not come! He had gone out urgently to buy some stuff and not turned up yet!

Raising her face, Panikkathi found that there was no one near her! Neither the registrar nor the registration book! Like mocking her, a leaf fell down from a nearby coconut tree.

It was said that Panikkathi had collected a ‘big’ amount for her wedding and her bridegroom had taken her for a ride!